Six Writers I Wish Were My BFFs
If you claim that you’ve never read a book and had a little daydream in which you and the author become best friends forever, you sit on a throne of lies. Here is my personal wish list of famous-writer BFFs (for the sake of levity, let’s all agree to overlook the minor detail that two of them are dead).
1. Neil Gaiman
Why I want to be his BFF: I’ve been to see him speak/read three times, and he is a delight. He’s articulate, charming, hilarious, and seems like a genuinely nice guy – he’s stayed at signings until the wee hours of the morning to make sure every single person who came out to see him got to have their book signed. He is very vocal about his support for public libraries and I have always admired him putting his weight behind that cause. Also, having read Sandman and several of his novels, I’ve noticed that we have a lot of the same feels about a lot of the same things. Also, we have a mutual obsession with Doctor Who. Also, he’s married to Amanda Palmer and I won’t lie, I wouldn’t say no if she wanted to hang out with us and maybe play the ukulele for a minute.
Activities we could do together as BFFs: Drink tea, read comics, watch Doctor Who, go shopping for black clothes, practice apiculture, get a little drunk and
make out contemplate love, death, and the nature of the universe
2. Sylvia Plath
Why I want to be her BFF: Her bravery in writing so honestly (and beautifully) about her feelings and her life is incredibly inspiring to me. The Bell Jar was published as a novel but was based heavily on her own experience with mental illness, which still carries a significant stigma now, much less 50 years ago. It takes serious guts to write something like that and put it out into the world. In reading interviews with her, I see an intelligent, well-spoken, thoughtful woman, and I’d be honored to have a friend like that.
Things we could do together as BFFs: Go to poetry readings, complain about men, practice apiculture (yup, her too)
3. Joe Hill
Why I want to be his BFF: He’s a nerd, and I love nerds. He appreciates (and writes) good horror. He’s such a big Doctor Who fan that he has a life-size replica of the TARDIS in his living room. Also, he’s awesome at Twitter and I appreciate a man with a good Pinterest account. Also, I wouldn’t mind chatting with his old man at the occasional backyard BBQ.
Things we could do together as BFFs: Cosplay, watch Doctor Who, read comics, send each other Pinterest pins
4. JK Rowling
Why I want to be her BFF: The reason’s probably clear to everyone, and that reason is that JK Rowling is awesome. She’s smart, incredibly philanthropic, and a great role model. Also imaginative. Obviously.
Things we could do together as BFFs: Try Pinterest butterbeer recipes, giggle hysterically over weird Harry Potter fan fiction, get matching horcrux tattoos
5. Jack Kerouac
Why I want to be his BFF: The man clearly knew how to have a good time, and he had the heart and soul of a poet. In reading his books as a young adult, I always found myself thinking, “This guy gets me.” Added bonus: If you’ve ever seen a photo of him, you may have noticed that he fell out of the handsome tree and hit every branch on the way down.
Things we could do together as BFFs: Drugs, roadtrips, Buddhism
6. Chuck Palahniuk
Why I want to be his BFF: Uh, have you read any of his books? If not, read one and tell me you don’t want to be friends with someone that interesting. His most recent book tour was a series of “pajama party” events, and he throws out stuffed animals as prizes so people won’t be too shy to ask questions at the Q&As. He sends handwritten thank-you notes and gift boxes to fans who write to him. Seriously, the dude puts some crazy shiz into his novels, but he’s a sweetheart. And judging by the photos I’ve seen of him with fans, he’s cuddly, too.
Things we could do together as BFFs: Snuggle, shop for toys for his next tour, not talk about Fight Club
What about you? Any writers you feel like you could be besties with, if only they knew you were alive?